If this morning you woke up to the news that Kanye West visited Trump Tower to meet with the president-elect and then tried to wake up again: This isn’t a God dream. This is 2016.
Because the nature of Trump’s meeting with West wasn’t immediately disclosed, and because most public figures who have made recent trips to the Tower have done so to discuss possible cabinet appointments, West’s appearance stirred speculation that America might not have to wait till 2020 to peek a Kanye West-Wing.
In a world where West wasn’t planning his inauguration performance (as rumored), or just catching up with a longtime “friend,” as Trump asserts, here are some cabinet positions we think ‘Ye might be best suited to hold:
- Secretary of Energy: Sure, former Texas Gov. Rick Perry is the man expected to get the post. But no one man should have all that power, and if one must, why not someone who is “doing it better than anybody you ever seen do it”?
- Trade Representative: West, who “shops so much he can speak Italian,” is not unfamiliar with foreign goods. He also sells his very beige, very lukewarmly-received clothing line Yeezy in countries around the world. And being Trade Representative is probably about shopping, right? (No.)
- Secretary of Education: West didn’t so much as graduate from college as he “decided he was finished.” A successful rap career later, he’s living proof that sometimes the concept of school only “seems so securrr.” Exactly what one looks for in a Secretary of Education.
- Secretary of Defense: For obvious reasons.
No longer the “abomination of Obama’s nation,” it remains to be seen what role a newly-blonde Kanye, fresh out of the hospital, will play in Trump’s presidency. Stay tuned.