There’s a gallon of Blue Bell ice cream in my freezer that might be the last that I buy. Best I can tell, kids and listeria isn’t a combination I’d want to experience. Do I dare give Blue Bell a third strike, or call it at two?
Either way, when you’re as Texan as a hat full of horny toads, it’s sad to give up on a Lone Star icon. That’s why I went through H-E-B recently, looking for other products that are all Texan and no toxin (hopefully). Here’s what I found …
To be honest, I haven’t tried these yet. But the combination of Tex-Mex food and German-Czech beer couldn’t be more Texan.
You might think I’d have gone with the beloved Whataburger ketchup, but (don’t tell anyone) I’ve been a Heinz fan since the days of the Armadillo World Headquarters.
I always thought Julio’s tortilla chips were from San Angelo, but that was their second location. The addictively spicy chips were born in Del Rio.
Sure, they’re owned by a California corporation. And the old San Antonio brewery is now a collection of uppity restaurants and shops. But Pearl (barely still available in 12-packs of cans only) is still the oldest Texas beer, beating out Shiner by 13 years.
At one point, in Victoria, I lived off my own cooking — which meant that I lived off Stubb’s barbecue sauce and whatever it could cover up. But Stubb’s has gone national, and I’ve moved on to The Salt Lick’s Original sauce.
To be honest, I don’t know anything about this product. But I wanted some dried sausage. And it was delicious.
When you think about Texas, you think about brisket. And you should. But barbecuing brisket (well) is an elite activity. Almost anyone can make pretty good fajitas within a few hours of thinking “hey, you know what would be good?”
To tell the truth, I was looking for Earl Campbell’s BBQ Rib Rub, which is more Texan than Tom Landry holding an armadillo. But since C.B. Stubblefield is the patron saint of Texas barbecue, it’s only right to honor him.
I wouldn’t turn down a Texas-shaped cookie, no I wouldn’t. But let’s be honest — that’s entry-level stuff. Step up your game to Alamo cookies.